Sheldon

I hope you're not watching "Chernobyl"?

Fire up the Quattro!

Oh, right, just a nutter, then. As you were, everybody.

That sounds like a challenge to engage in a race to the bottom. There's lots worse where that came from.

"To find out more about what life is like working for the Department of Infrastructure, watch our video starring our wonderful employees talking about their careers within the Department." A little bit of sick just came up in my mouth.

Does he look like he gives a fuck?

Definately!

I'm familiar with her background. Basically, she was kicked out by her (adoptive) parents pretty much as soon as she was physically old enough, although mentally she's probably still in her early teens. As in so many similar cases, benefits now sustain her. She does it more for a laugh than for any other motive, and certainly without grasping the possible consequences of her actions. On a slightly tangential note, have instances like this increased much over the last 40 years in your experience, given that mental health issues now - theoretically at least - are much less of a stigma? Or is it just that we hear about it more often now than we used to.

Anything's possible, I suppose. Certainly, someone somewhere's got no imagination. Health and Social Care Minister David Ashford MHK said: ‘I thank Malcolm for the dedication and enormous hard work that he has given to the DHSC, and wish him well for the future. I would also like to thank him for the help and support he has provided to me personally during my 15 months as Minister.’ Michaela Morris joined the newly-merged department in September 2014. Mr Ashford said: ’I would like to thank her for her dedication, all the help and support she has provided to me personally during my time as Minister and the enormous hard work she has given to the DHSC. I wish Michaela well for the future.’

If the article is correct (yes, I know) then Ashford has trotted out the exact same stock phrases for both resignations, just in a slightly different order. There's nothing like the personal touch - and that's nothing like the personal touch.

On further reflection, I'm not sure this necessarily follows. Indeed, there is some precedent for the possibility that alcohol-related superpowers would actually ensue. Radioactive spiders? Pah!

You appear to have misspelled "stroke". (Not an uncommon side effect, as it happens.)

Chemtrails in 5... 4... 3...

What is it with men who wear bow ties? That should set alarm bells ringing all by itself.