Sheldon

Going, going, gone.

Do you teach Reception, or Year 1?

Arseglobule A hint of the exotic, especially if you pronounce it with an Italian accent, it almost has "globe" in it, the sun shines out of it, and most importantly there are no matches on Google - not even on Urban Dictionary. That'll be £250,000.00 pounds, please (plus VAT) - not bad for 30 seconds work.

I don't think it's even close to the worst marketing drivel ever, not when ranked against the likes of Utmost's corporate values. How people can keep a straight face while churning out this sort of bollocks never ceases to amaze me. Adventurously Safe Progressively Traditional Collaboratively Independent Flexibly Rigid Amusingly Serious Openly Discreet

Even though we scarcely interacted, which is not surprising given that you've made about five million posts for every one of mine, I will miss your contributions. I'm heartened to see that among the many posters you've recalled there is no room for a mention of TJ, or for Pierrot Lunaire (or whatever xe was last calling xemself.) I suppose we'll never know now whether this was deliberate or just a sin of omission.

Among several upcoming projects, this one in particular caught my eye. What could possibly go wrong?

I must get myself some of this! or, alternatively...

No, it's the title of a 1967 ITV sitcom. I suspect at least one of us is showing our age with our respective references. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Never_Mind_the_Quality,_Feel_the_Width

Never Mind the Quality, Feel the Width.

Arguing. Internet. Idiot. DON'T!

The killer question would be: "If elected, will you be producing a lengthy weekly blog?" Anyone who answers in the affirmative should be immediately removed from the ballot.

The words "Onchan" and "Facebook" are good individual indicators. Put them together and it's a near certainty.

It's simply awful, isn't it, and the more you look at it the worse it gets. I console myself with the thought that the voters of Douglas South had the good sense to bin off Facebook warrior Amy Burns, so maybe they'll see through this cynical campaign too. The trouble is, there aren't many better alternatives in this field.

I suspect this actually will come as news to Perkins.