KERED

Maybe he doesn't want to wipe his arse on the internet,

"Meet the new boss Same as the old boss" The Who (Not the World Health Organisation) - Won't Get Fooled Again.

I used to live next door to Alice. (For 24 years)

Did the police respond quickly and effectively when you reported this?

But I'm worried that it will make me go blind.

I hate having to sit through all those tedious news items whilst waiting for the latest editions of Where's Wotton and Ben's Banger.

Another gem from the MR "Nooze" Team: Multiple lawnmowers stolen in Ballasalla What is a multiple lawnmower? Is it one that will cut several lawns at the same time? Or maybe it will also cut your hedges?

Perhaps he could become the next Tarzan?

I think that was Miss Piggy.

The Phantom Grammar Strangler of Old Manx Radio Towers strikes again: MHK wants update on going NSC leisure pool closure

Well - just keep taking the tablets!

When I heard that an eagle had been spotted on the Island, I thought that it was maybe a reference to George (Eddie The Eagle) Ferguson having landed on Douglas Head. Still - it's heart-warming to see that he has been welcomed back into the fold, after all the slagging-off that MR employees have given him over the last decade or so. I am sure that Georgie Boy will be superb in attracting a younger audience, and he doesn't look a day over 75, resplendent in the Manx Radio white shirt on the web page.

Agreed! It is (to quote Peter Karran) all very clubby clubby, pally pally, chummy chummy.

Yes, I agree, Declan. They seem to be creating their own language: ' Granite obelisks - recently installed for the first time along the Island's longest walking route - have sparked negativity.'

A couple of weeks in 'Britain's Best Little Prison' should see him completely rehabilitated and ready to become a valuable member of society.