Despite the fact that it's becoming ever clearer that it won't matter who you vote for because they'll all turn it to shit, 24 of these knuckle-dragging, drooling fantasists (well that's most of them) will be elected just one week from now. So here's the result...straight from the world inside my head.
AC&M - Gawne and Crowther (but Parker close)
Ayre - Cannan and Baker
Douglas Central - Thomas and Falk
Douglas East - Robertshaw and Halsall
Douglas North - Peake and Houghton
Douglas South - Malarkey and Beecroft
Garff - Perkins and Caine
Glenfaba and Peel - Boot and Harmer
Middle - Craine and Quayle
Onchan - Quirk and Callister
Ramsey - Allinson and Singer (Hooper close, but no cigar)
Rushen - Watterson and Skelly
It need hardly be said that writing some of those predictions involved mental and physical pain, such is the appalling quality of some candidates who, I believe, will be elected.
So, where am I wrong..? Over to you.