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Shopping For Sex At Tesco


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  • 4 weeks later...

I like to walk round tesco with a cucumber down the front if my trousers to see if I attract any female attention. If I don't I slip it back on the shelf before leaving.

You could always take it home and shove it through next doors letterbox and shout "The Martians have landed" (one of Ken Dodd's)biggrin.png

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There was a joke about Tom Jones and a potato, but couldn't find it. This one is ace though:


A woman gets on a bus with her baby.

The bus driver says: “Ugh, that’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen!” The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!” The man says: “You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”


Tommy Cooper.

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