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Manx Radio DJ Autism Comments


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Wow, I thought MF was a tough crowd until I posted on THAT group.   For the avoidance of doubt I have absolutely nothing against children with any physical or mental challenges, my initial post was

Time to draw a line under this. I will maintain on oath if necessary that my comments had absolutely nothing to do with autism and everything to do with badly behaved children in general, but I also s

How do children learn how to behave in public if they are never in public? How do autistic people learn to cope with public situations if they aren't exposed to public situations.

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Pseudonyms don't stop this happening, sadly. Most people (myself included) don't have the self-discipline to entirely isolate an online persona from their real life.

 

it's hard work maintaining a complete anonymous identity on here I can tell you, luckily I've always managed it

 

It's a very common look.

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This has all been about offence. The kids behaviour offended the manager (and maybe other diners), his comments offended the mother, her post offended Stu, Stu's thoughtless comments offended some parents because he included (probably inadvertently) Autistic kids in his ire for badly behaved kids, the offence that he caused was amplified because there are people who get offended by autistic kids in restaurants and people are sensitive to, Stu and his supporters got offended that his free speech was being impacted.

 

We need to all recognise that sometimes people make mistakes, and everything won't be perfect. So it doesn't really matter if kids mess about while we're having a meal, if we aren't happy with a restaurant don't go back. We should think about what we say and be sensitive to others feelings, and it's right to point out when someone's comments are insensitive. But equally, recognise that the comments might have been an error or weren't intended that way. And be aware that we might make a mistake, and just because we didn't intend the comments to be hurtful doesn't mean they weren't.

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stu had to apologise in the end or alex brindley would have put both their balls in a vice. for that reason alone, i wouldn't have apologised

 

They'd have to make a custom vice if you ever win a charity auction to go on a date with Alex Brindley

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This has all been about offence. The kids behaviour offended the manager (and maybe other diners), his comments offended the mother, her post offended Stu, Stu's thoughtless comments offended some parents because he included (probably inadvertently) Autistic kids in his ire for badly behaved kids, the offence that he caused was amplified because there are people who get offended by autistic kids in restaurants and people are sensitive to, Stu and his supporters got offended that his free speech was being impacted.

 

We need to all recognise that sometimes people make mistakes, and everything won't be perfect. So it doesn't really matter if kids mess about while we're having a meal, if we aren't happy with a restaurant don't go back. We should think about what we say and be sensitive to others feelings, and it's right to point out when someone's comments are insensitive. But equally, recognise that the comments might have been an error or weren't intended that way. And be aware that we might make a mistake, and just because we didn't intend the comments to be hurtful doesn't mean they weren't.

 

People are allowed opinions, and sometimes those opinions are going to offend others. You shouldn't have to apologise for having them or expressing them. People need to recognise that not everyone has to agree with you or be nice to you.

 

What exactly should Stu be apologising for? For saying that you shouldn't allow your offspring to disrupt other people's enjoyment of something they've paid for? Whether they are disabled or not there is no discrimination involved. It's not the child's disability that is being discriminated for, but their disruptive behaviour.

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Me and the wife went out not long ago. It wasn't the table to our left with the children that were disruptive, they were good as gold, it was the table to the right with the adults that were effing and jeffing at full volume. The more they drank the louder they got. I'd rather a table full of kids over that any day.

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This has all been about offence. The kids behaviour offended the manager (and maybe other diners), his comments offended the mother, her post offended Stu, Stu's thoughtless comments offended some parents because he included (probably inadvertently) Autistic kids in his ire for badly behaved kids, the offence that he caused was amplified because there are people who get offended by autistic kids in restaurants and people are sensitive to, Stu and his supporters got offended that his free speech was being impacted.

 

We need to all recognise that sometimes people make mistakes, and everything won't be perfect. So it doesn't really matter if kids mess about while we're having a meal, if we aren't happy with a restaurant don't go back. We should think about what we say and be sensitive to others feelings, and it's right to point out when someone's comments are insensitive. But equally, recognise that the comments might have been an error or weren't intended that way. And be aware that we might make a mistake, and just because we didn't intend the comments to be hurtful doesn't mean they weren't.

 

People are allowed opinions, and sometimes those opinions are going to offend others. You shouldn't have to apologise for having them or expressing them. People need to recognise that not everyone has to agree with you or be nice to you.

 

What exactly should Stu be apologising for? For saying that you shouldn't allow your offspring to disrupt other people's enjoyment of something they've paid for? Whether they are disabled or not there is no discrimination involved. It's not the child's disability that is being discriminated for, but their disruptive behaviour.

 

 

 

If you set out to offend someone, and deliberately choose words that are intended to upset then any apology is hollow and you should stand by the words and face the consequences.

 

However, if you say something, and express yourself badly and inadvertently hurt someone, why wouldn't you apologise? If you bump into someone by mistake you say sorry. So Stu says, he didn't mean autistic kids, he didn't mean to upset their parents, but he has, why then wouldn't he apologise?

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11 pages of waffle.

 

Opinions are like arseholes, everybody's got one.

 

The End!

 

The forum would be a lot quieter though

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It gives me no pleasure whatsoever to leave this site for good. There have been times I enjoyed some of the banter with those that manage to converse without foul language and abuse. However there appear to be more and more of the opposite ilk, and this recent discussion has brought them to the fore. I accept Stus apology , and hope he has learned from this. So sad that there are ( probably only a small number ) contributors whose sole reason for being on here is to abuse others. Incidentally this time I really do mean goodbye , I have returned a couple of times in the past, in the hope that a bit more decency and sensible discussion may have appeared. Sadly I was wrong. Goodbye

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