Chat Up Lines

[Knoxville 51]

Hey Knoxville, I am totally shocked at you !!

 

Just for BB then:

 

Is that a ladder in your tights or a stair way to heaven?

 

That dress is gorgeous.......but would look better on my bedroom floor.

 

I may not be Fred Flintstone........but I'll make your Bed Rock.

 

Heres 20p, call your Mum/House Mate and tell them you wont be home tonight.

 

Whats for breakfast in the monring?

 

You're so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear.

 

The word of the day is "legs." Let's go back to my place and spread the word.

 

My name's.............. That's so you know what to scream.

 

Your dad must have been a baker, 'cause you've got a nice set of buns.

 

Put your crash helmet on, you're going through the head board.

 

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

 

(Use index finger to call someone over then say) If I made you come this fast with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand.

 

Many many more

[theintelligentthug 0]

"so your a dancer, huh?"

 

"yeah, ive not done it for a while"

 

"heheh, can you put your legs behind your head?, wink wink"

 

"no, like i said, its a long time ago"

 

"never mind then, you can always put them behind mine. taxi!"

 

that one worked. as did this one;

 

 

"scuse me love, do you want to go halves on a bastard?"

 

 

 

worked like a charm.

[mollag 366]

Dont forget the foxdale favorite

 

"Do you know the difference between a large erect penis, and a chicken drumstick?"

 

" No"

 

" Fancy a picnic then?"

[StuartT 25]

Dont forget the foxdale favorite

 

"Do you know the difference between a large erect penis, and a chicken drumstick?"

 

" No"

 

" Fancy a picnic then?"

I thought the Foxdale/Jurby favourite was "Hey!, aren't you my sister/cousin"??????

[UniSol 30]

Knoxville, I remember you saying most of those above at School

 

A classic:

I am the Shermanator, A sophisticated sex robot sent back through time to change the future for one lucky lady..

 

That's right [name]. You've been targeted for Shermanation.

 

(extends hand) Come with me if you want to live

[StuartT 25]

Knoxville, I remember you saying most of those above at School

 

A classic:

I am the Shermanator, A sophisticated sex robot sent back through time to change the future for one lucky lady..

 

That's right [name]. You've been targeted for Shermanation.

 

(extends hand) Come with me if you want to live

Yeah, but then he does end up with the sexy east European lass.....

[crumlin 0]

A friend of mine comes straight to the point whens she had a few to drink and being chatted up, she just shouts out Come on then show us your Dick

[Knoxville 51]

Knoxville, I remember you saying most of those above at School

 

A classic:

I am the Shermanator, A sophisticated sex robot sent back through time to change the future for one lucky lady..

 

That's right [name]. You've been targeted for Shermanation.

 

(extends hand) Come with me if you want to live

Yeah, but then he does end up with the sexy east European lass.....

 

Of course I did

 

Uni, was going to put some of Garretts up, but there a bit crude hahahaha " I can see your lips moving.....but can't hear what your saying "

 

Some more classics for you lucky people ( please try not to use them all, as I need them also.....Ladies you now know who I am )

 

Can I have directions? "To where?" To your heart.

 

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.

 

How about you sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up?

 

I hope you know CPR, 'cause you take my breath away - Love it, always good " You've lost that Loving Feeling "

 

What time do you have to be back in heaven?

 

I didn't believe in angels until I meet you!

 

I have had a really bad day and it always makes me feel better to see a pretty girl smile. So, would you smile for me?

 

Bet you're tired of hearing chat up lines, when words can't be compared or express the true nature of your beauty!

 

When I look into your eyes I see the Moon and the stars.

 

Your eyes are like spanners..... every time you look at me my nuts tighten.

 

I may not be the best looking man in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

 

You are so hot, its girls like you that are the real reason for global warming.

 

I wish you were a door so I could bang you all day long.

 

You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?

 

Have you ever been to the moon ? no ! sit on my rocket and I will take you there.

 

Do you like fruit? Suck this its a fucking peach.

 

Break a bit of ice on the floor and say "Now I've broken the ice can I buy you a drink?"

 

I'm like Domino's Pizza/Home Run, if you don't come in 30 minutes the next one is free...

 

To a ugly woman...''I never look at the mantle piece when I'm poking the fire'' - You'll get a slap, but well worth it for the banter/tales.

 

My hands are cold, can I put them in your bra to warm up?

 

Here, have another bottle of wine.

 

Over here, now, bitch - A personal favourite of Princeys.

 

Hey baby lets play army I'll lay down you can blow me up.

 

You're so sweet you're giving me a toothache.

 

Hi, I'm new in town. Can I have directions to your house?

 

So do you want to see something really swell?

 

I've got the hot dog and you got the buns.

 

Is your name Gillette? ...because you're the best a man can get.

 

Master class over for today

 

Ladies, I'll be wearing the mistle toe B)

[UniSol 30]

Unreal how you have these all memorised. 100% Sleaze, you were well bahaved last week though *cough*

[Knoxville 51]

Unreal how you have these all memorised. 100% Sleaze, you were well bahaved last week though *cough*

 

What are you trying to say? Thats a bad cough you've got mate?

 

If I could remember half of last Saturday I would be happy

 

Don't belive what Uni says, he bullies me into using them!!!!

[Mr. Sausages 6,371]

I don't think I could live with myself if I actually said any of those out loud.

[zephyr 4]

I'll see again then sometime (Hello did you have to leave the Island because of the plague or is it an excuse)

 

I think you have a smashing pair of legs! (One is smashing fuck out of the other)

 

I think you have a fine pair of legs (any finer and they'd snap)

 

That's you're sister? She looks sexy!

 

Love is only skin deep

 

Girl (No not that Girl) if I was but twenty years younger (you'd still be too young for me)

 

Don't touch what you can't afford

 

Is it true that your muff is shaved?

 

Heaven must be missing an angel, cos your standing in front of me now

 

Are you Catholic or a prodi? cos I don't like condoms

 

You know you remind me of my ex

 

Hi! (Oh your going to dance, go to the toilet, go anywhere where I'm not)

 

All these chat up lines have ended up with me being hit.

[Mission 1,108]

This seems to be rapidly becoming a reference of what NOT to say rather than the opposite.

[Virginia P 0]

Being somewhat on the comely side, I find the following line always works on you weak and shallow males -

 

 

 

"Hello"

[Mission 1,108]

Heh there's a thought, to save you women the awful chat up lines, why don't you just approach a guy you like the look of and follow Virginia P's advice and just say hello.